love

at some point early on, i realized that love was a dumb idea. all those movies and tv shows where people say, when it's love you just KNOW, as if it's some sort of infection or disease that inflicts everyone with the same symptoms, the concept couldn't possibly be true. and after my first relationship came and went, and i started to wonder what it would be like to fall in love, or when this thing would happen to me, my ideas on love began to change. i thought love couldn't be a real thing. emotions are just a chemical reaction in the brain, and everyone is different in the way they experience the world. i decided that love was something to be decided. when i felt that a sufficient amount of time had passed or a sufficient amount of emotion had been felt, i would just go ahead and say it. because really, what did it matter? i guess in some ways i still believe this. there is no such thing as "love" like you hear in songs and read on gross candy hearts that i'm pretty sure are made of chalk. love is probably different for everyone, and i'm sure relationships can find love in different ways. but it turns out it's true what they say. when you're in love, you just know it. you can't stop knowing it, and you can't stop being amazed that you know it. i never thought i could fall in love, and while it makes me feel kind of lame like a bad r&b song, i have never been so happy to be wrong.